Our Kids Play Hockey
Our Kids Play Hockey is a podcast that focuses on youth hockey, offering insights, stories, and interviews from the hockey community. It provides valuable advice for parents, coaches, and players, covering various aspects of the game, including skill development, sportsmanship, teamwork, and creating a positive experience for young athletes. The show frequently features guests who share their expertise and personal experiences in youth hockey, both on and off the ice.
The show features three hockey parents, who all work in the game at high levels:
- Christie Casciano-Burns - USA Hockey Columnist, Author, and WSYR Anchor
- Mike Bonelli - USA Hockey Coach and Organizational Consultant
- Lee M.J. Elias - Hockey Entrepreneur, Author, and Team Strategist
In addition to the main podcast, there are several spin-off series that dive into specific aspects of youth hockey:
1.Our Girls Play Hockey – This series highlights the growing presence of girls in hockey, addressing the unique challenges they face while celebrating their accomplishments and contributions to the sport. Each episode of Our Girls Play Hockey is also hosted by Sheri Hudspeth who is the Director, Youth Hockey Programs and Fan Development for the Vegas Golden Knights.
2.The Ride to The Rink – A shorter, motivational series designed to be listened to on the way to the rink, offering quick, inspirational tips and advice to help players and parents get into the right mindset before a game or practice.
3.Our Kids Play Goalie – This series is dedicated to young goalies and the unique challenges they face. It provides advice for players, parents, and coaches on how to support and develop young goaltenders, focusing on the mental and physical demands of the position.
Together, these shows provide a comprehensive platform for parents, players, and coaches involved in youth hockey, offering insights for all aspects of the sport, from parenting, playing, or coaching to specialized positions like goaltending.
Our Kids Play Hockey
The Ride To The Rink: Adversity Is a Privilege: What Getting Cut Teaches You – With Tessa Bonhomme
Getting cut from a team hurts—but it doesn’t define your future. Olympic gold medalist and broadcaster Tessa Bonhomme joins The Ride to the Rink to deliver an inspiring message to every young player who didn’t make the team this season.
In just 10 minutes, Tessa shares:
- Why being cut can actually be a gift
- How to turn disappointment into fuel for growth
- The truth about building a winning team (hint: it’s not all top scorers)
- Her personal “Google Maps” analogy for navigating your unique hockey path
- A powerful mindset shift: “Face Everything And Rise”
Whether you’re on a new team or still searching for your next opportunity, this episode is a reminder that adversity is part of every great hockey story—including yours.
🎙️ Press play, get motivated, and get to the rink ready to rise.
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Lee MJ Elias [0:07 - 0:47]: Hello, hockey skaters and goalies around the world. Welcome back to another edition of the Ride to the Rink. Got an Olympian here today, got a broadcaster here today, got someone who is wonderful. Tessa is here today to talk to you kids. We know it's the time of year when we're recording this at least where teams have to make some tough decisions. Maybe you made the team, maybe you didn't make the team. Today we're going to talk to both of you, but specifically the kids. Maybe you didn't get to where you wanted to be this year on your hockey journey. And Tessa, I'm going to turn it to you. I would just love for you to share with the kids, listening, you know, details about the journey and adversity and what happens when maybe you don't make the team that you wanted to make.
Tessa Bonhomme [0:47 - 1:49]: Yeah, I, I feel like it's something that doesn't make somebody truly unique when you get cut. There's a lot of people in that same boat and a lot of people that you see on TV playing on these professional teams and on national teams. And I think if you talk to each and every single one of them, and one of us, myself included, being cut was probably one of the best things that ever happened to us. And in the moment, it didn't feel like it for sure. And I think that that says a lot. If you've been cut and you are really upset by it and it hurts you, that is probably the single most greatest thing because that means you care and that means you want something. So number one, you're already winning. It also gives you an opportunity to kind of just sit back and say, okay, let's do some self assessment. What about my game is great? You know what, what do I bring to a team that I do really well? Is it relentless on the forecheck? Is it the fact that you never get out worked?
Tessa Bonhomme [1:49 - 1:51]: Is it the fact that you rarely.
Tessa Bonhomme [1:51 - 1:55]: Ever lose a battle in the corner or you have really good net front presence?
Tessa Bonhomme [1:55 - 1:57]: What is it? What is it that you're really good at?
Tessa Bonhomme [1:57 - 2:12]: Focus on that and then give yourself a moment to say, okay, what is it about my game that could improve, that could make me that much better, not then the next person, but make me personally that much better as a player.
Tessa Bonhomme [2:13 - 2:13]: Right.
Tessa Bonhomme [2:13 - 2:36]: Because there's no competition here. It's you against you. It's you for you making yourself the best player for a team to help them be successful. And I think one of the coolest things that I was ever told by a coach recently is that it was Actually by a gm Gina Kingsbury, the Toronto Scepters is that when she's building an Olympic team, it's so easy just.
Tessa Bonhomme [2:36 - 2:39]: To take all of the best players. That's easy.
Tessa Bonhomme [2:39 - 3:13]: But that doesn't necessarily mean she's built the best team because the best team is a puzzle. There's a picture that she's trying to paint. So if she took all of the best players well, who's going to be the responsible shutdown forward line? You need players that understand and play defense really, really well as a forward line. You need someone who's really good at taking face offs. You need someone who is willing to sacrifice and block shots and be, you know, never ending back check or that kind of stuff, really responsible in their D zone. And she said sometimes we have a.
Tessa Bonhomme [3:13 - 3:15]: Player who is really good and could.
Tessa Bonhomme [3:15 - 3:17]: Probably be one of the top players.
Tessa Bonhomme [3:17 - 3:19]: That is skilled or, or really one.
Tessa Bonhomme [3:19 - 3:22]: Of the goods but they don't fit the, they don't fit the mold or.
Tessa Bonhomme [3:22 - 3:24]: That their, their shape of the piece.
Tessa Bonhomme [3:24 - 3:48]: Doesn'T match the shape that we need for a puzzle. And unfortunately a player like that gets left off. So it's never anything personal. It's never anything like you're not good enough. Sometimes you just, your puzzle piece isn't this shape of the piece that they need. The other thing I always say to my, my kids that come to my hockey school when I hear they've been cut is anything you want in life, obviously you have an end goal.
Tessa Bonhomme [3:48 - 3:50]: So for hockey players it's probably PWL.
Tessa Bonhomme [3:50 - 3:58]: Or representing Canada, also a great goal. And each and every player has their own Google Maps.
Tessa Bonhomme [3:58 - 3:58]: Right?
Tessa Bonhomme [3:58 - 4:11]: Everyone? Okay, type it in. We all want to play for Team Canada. Cool. Well, for me, Tessa Bonhomme, my Google map looked completely different than Megan Augustus Google map. We took two completely different routes.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:11 - 4:11]: Why?
Tessa Bonhomme [4:11 - 4:22]: Well, I ran into some adversity, a little bit of a road stop one way. I didn't make it one year, so my map had to go around. Sometimes you have to circle back a little bit in order to move forward.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:22 - 4:23]: Right.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:23 - 4:26]: Sometimes you're taking two or three detours.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:26 - 4:28]: But, but the purpose of this is.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:28 - 4:42]: That if you stick to the map and you stay committed to where you're going, you will end up there or somewhere amazing along the way. And it's important to understand what I was talking about, about having to go.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:42 - 4:43]: Back a little bit.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:43 - 4:44]: Sometimes you got to take two steps.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:44 - 4:45]: Back like I said and do that.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:45 - 4:57]: Self assessment and love yourself for the things that you do amazing. And celebrate yourself for trying because the hardest Part sometimes is going out there and trying and trying your best.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:57 - 4:59]: So the fact that you're upset that.
Tessa Bonhomme [4:59 - 5:24]: You got cut is great. The fact that you went out there and tried your tail off is fantastic. So you're already two up, and then all you got to do now is just sit back and assess and then figure out where your Google map is taking you next. Because it might take me five extra minutes to get somewhere or an extra hour to get somewhere than Megan, Augusta, and. And that's okay. We're both going to end up there.
Lee MJ Elias [5:24 - 6:12]: I love that, Tessa. And I'll tell you, for the kids listening, too, you know, we always talk about your emotions, and, you know, what Tessa is describing so well is how your emotions are an antenna for action. And we always say this, Tessa, that it's tough sometimes, kids, to remember that what you're feeling and it hurts when you get cut or you don't make the team. It hurts bad. And everyone here has felt that. But you got to remember that feeling will not last forever. It will pass. It's so important as a kid to understand that this is true in games, too. When you're down a goal, down two goals, you got to learn to understand that that emotion is just an antenna, and it's trying to tell you something about, as you said, Tessa, the map, where you're heading, like, maybe you're going the wrong way. You need to pay attention to those emotions.
Tessa Bonhomme [6:13 - 6:23]: Absolutely. I think, too, that I don't think there's anybody that's ever made it somewhere and done something great without any adversity.
Lee MJ Elias [6:23 - 6:24]: Yeah.
Tessa Bonhomme [6:24 - 6:36]: I would say, yeah, it's impossible. There's no such thing. So these are what you call growing moments. And you should feel very privileged to have growing moments like this.
Lee MJ Elias [6:38 - 6:40]: Mike, did you have something? I heard you talking down there.
Mike Bonelli [6:41 - 7:30]: No, I love it. I think any. Any player that's listened to this and can understand that, you know, failure is just part of the process of succeeding, and you probably hear it all the time, but I think it's, you know, and Tessa did this as a player. Right. Sherry did this as a player, and you. That, you know, when you do fail, and you will then come up with a plan to combat that failure and then get yourself back on your, you know, Google Map and figure out what your new path is going to be. And I think if you can do that in a very short period of time, you know, you can grieve, you could be upset, you could be. You could be mad, but then turn that into something positive. And as I often say to a lot of older players, you know, if you don't feel those feelings and you're not upset and it doesn't bother you, then maybe you need to reflect on that as well.
Lee MJ Elias [7:30 - 7:31]: Right.
Mike Bonelli [7:31 - 7:51]: And maybe that's just not a great path to go on. So just, you know, you be the driver of this. You be the driver of that failure, and you can do it what you want with it. Don't let somebody else define who you are. There are just a couple of people up at a booth making decisions, and. And maybe they got it wrong. And. And I don't know if you have to prove that they got it wrong, you just have to prove to yourself that you can get it right.
Tessa Bonhomme [7:52 - 8:22]: Yeah. And I think, too, with tryouts and stuff, there's often a fear of failure which paralyzes a player and doesn't really allow them to play free or to their full potential. That's happened to me in years before, and. And I. I always. There was this little thing that I would write down, and it was fear. F, E, A R. So you could forget everything and run. And that's when you allow fear to own you. Or you can face everything and rise. And, you know, I.
Tessa Bonhomme [8:22 - 8:22]: It.
Tessa Bonhomme [8:22 - 8:27]: I basically looked at it and gave myself a choice. What do you want to do here? Like, you came here?
Tessa Bonhomme [8:27 - 8:28]: You're suited up.
Tessa Bonhomme [8:28 - 8:29]: Just face everything and rise.
Tessa Bonhomme [8:29 - 8:30]: Go play.
Tessa Bonhomme [8:30 - 8:48]: Go have fun. It's a game, after all, and it's meant to be played with a smile. So for all the kids out there, hockey will make you smile again. Trust me, I've been cut more than once. And if you stick to it and you're working hard, it will pay off in dividends in many different ways. More ways than you know.
Lee MJ Elias [8:48 - 9:07]: Well, I will say, kids, we're all always learning, including young adults like all of us on the show today, because I'm learning that I'm going to take what Tessa said about that Google Maps roadmap, and I'm going to tell that to all my players. We're always learning, gang. This was great. Tessa, thanks so much for joining us and talking with the kids for a few minutes.
Tessa Bonhomme [9:08 - 9:09]: My pleasure.
Tessa Bonhomme [9:09 - 9:10]: Pleasure to be here.
Tessa Bonhomme [9:10 - 9:13]: Thanks for having me, everyone. It's been a. It's been a ton of fun, and what a privilege.
Lee MJ Elias [9:13 - 9:27]: All right, well, listen, kids, wherever you're at on your hockey journey, remember, we believe in you. You should, too. All right? Continue to play the greatest game on earth for the gang, for Tessa, for myself. We'll see on the next ride to the rinks. Get on kids and have fun. Take care.
